Not by my own might

So many times I tried to make things right, but none of it seemed to work like I wished. Some even backfired, and I couldn’t understand why, why did i make those clumsy mistakes that caused me the chances.

I seek many different views and opinions, hoping to find the answer to my questions, but none seemed to resonate within. 

I tried almost all the advices I got, but none seemed fit. Things didn’t get any better, while I remain stucked in my situation and insecurity. I just had to make things right.

Eventually, I decided not to try. I gave up trying not to try, and just let things be. When I do see her, I just say hi, bye, maybe another one or two sentences, and no more. 

I didn’t know I was trying too hard. I was trying to fix the relationship with my own strength. At my own will, I strived to achieve the goals I set out for, but ended up failing every single one of them. I even ended up in the few situations I feared and tried not to get into. 

Just tonight, i found my answer for the months of unanswered questions within:

“but what if the problem is that you’re trying to fix it in your own strength, and perhaps that trying to strive for this mutual understanding by your own words and through your own persuasive powers isn’t going to be sufficient ?”

Only God can save this now, only God can salvage this relationship. 

He told me earlier last month to put my hope in the Lord and trust in Him. 

In Him, i will trust.


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