I don’t usually write stuffs here. Most of them would be in my personal journal. But there’s a significance to this season or period where I want to journal down somewhere else. So whenever I am reminded of it, I can look it up here straight away. So am gonna post here for now.
The past few days have been pretty dramatic. Me going to brunei for army training on 8 oct and having to fly back 5 days later because grandpa got admitted into icu. He’s there for 5 days now.
My Dad has been so good to me and my family. Through this whole period its about seeing His goodness poured forth over me and my family. My grandpa receiving Christ (seemed like it), my unit giving me a week off for me to visit my gramps, not having to redo the brunei outfields like most of my mates, etc. Everything is just so ochestrated properly, so good, I can’t even . I am just dumbfounded.
God’s been speaking to me a lot about listening to the Holy Spirit. To obey the promptings and not resist it, even if I don’t understand or don’t really think its a good idea, even in small and simple decisions like applying a pimple cream (true story, lol). Afterall He knows best. It’s amazing how He cares for even the little details. Words just don’t do justice.
Talking about my grandpa, he seems like he wants to settle all of the issues regarding his sons before he can leave peacefully. I did felt God prompt me to recite the chinese version of Romans 8:28, but didnt know how to. Now I learned it, am gonna try telling him tmr. Anyway, he hopes to settle all tension and issues among his kids, but he couldnt speak because of the breathing tube in him. So it’s really saddening to imagine being in his shoes. He worries about my dad’s marriage, and has been asking him about it lately (before he entered icu). But my dad just shuts ppl off when mentioning my mum and his marriage, even my sis and I. When I mentioned it just now, he got agitated and now he’s acting up again, though not as uncontrolled as last time.
I just don’t know what to do now. Am here in the park because of this and the stuffs he said to me which hit me harder than it should. Don’t know if it’s just me or him or both of us.
That being said, I feel that I’m entering a season of knowing the goodness of God over my life and His providence, His ever-abundant love, acceptance and understanding. A season of drawing near.